18/06/2020

My Trip Last Year to Test Out Games For The Crystal Maze

I've been sat around pretty bored of late. I keep ending up on eBay buying Crystal Maze related paraphernalia (more on that lot in another post for another day) so I thought I'd distract myself by recounting my travel last year from the North East to the South West to test games for The Crystal Maze.

I'll start by saying I don't drive, but thankfully we've got pretty good public transport covering the length and breadth of Great Britain. 

So...

Step 1 - Home to Middlesbrough: ~15 Miles. 

This stage is the easy bit. It's a trip I make not uncommonly. I went to Uni over there so it's somewhere I'm familiar with. At this time, McDonalds was doing Grand Big Macs so naturally, I had to go gorge myself on one in my usual combo - large meal, Big Mac, Fries, Strawberry milkshake. They should do GBMs more often because that meal kept me fed for the rest of what would be a long day. The meal in bag in hand, I head back to the bus station to wait for my first coach. I didn't take it on the coach, food in my possession rarely stays uneaten for long.

Step 2 - Middlesbrough to Leeds: ~65 miles
Another easy bit, I've done this little stretch a few times in trips down south. Leeds is just where I changed coaches from one heading south to one heading southwest, didn't have to wait long.

Step 3 - Leeds to Birmingham: ~155 miles

This stage dragged a bit as the coach has a route to follow and pick up/drop off at a few places. However, it meant a chance to see the glamourous sights of Nottingham and Leicester. On these longer coach trips, I always have my phone, PSVita, back up battery charger and enough data to see me through. Sit down, find something to watch/play and I'll get cross-country with no effort at all, barely noticing the hours pass.
I spent about an hour at Birmingham coach station waiting for the next coach. 

Step 4 - Birmingham to Bristol: ~90 miles

Still a fair bit to go but it's made far easier by the fact I'm nearly there, relatively speaking. Having already been to the city twice the year before, I didn't feel the usual anxiety, probably because of the bubbling excitement of what I'd be doing tomorrow. As the coach is approaching Bristol, a notification pops up on my phone. A YouTuber who does reactions to British shows has uploaded a viewing of The Crystal Maze. I can't help but admire the timing. I know reaction videos can be frowned upon but to me, there's something about sharing a show that I've grown up with, with someone that's never seen it before that allows a little bit of that initial feeling when you yourself first discovered it that you can't really replicate. You can't watch Saw and react to the twist at the end twice, but you can enjoy someone else be hit by it.

Step 5 - Bristol Centre to the Hotel: ~6 miles

The year before, I walked this. I arrived in the city at about 9am after travelling overnight. Hotel check-in wasn't until 2, I figured I'd kill some time. This time around, arriving around 8-9pm, I figured I'd just get a taxi, I wasn't walking 6 miles through the night. After asking at a nearby hotel desk where the nearest taxi rank was, I get in a cab and have a 15 min ride to the hotel. 
The whole time we're weaving through the Bristol streets, I was thinking "Did I really walk this far last year?". I soon see a familiar road, leading to a familiar junction with a familiar McDonalds and a familiar hotel. At which point I pay the cabbie the equivalent of half my coach fare for the whole of what I paid to get me from up north to down here. I got the coach for really cheap considering how far I was going. £26 in total on coach travel.
I'm met by Jon who shows us where the room we're sharing is, and we all head into the pub next door. It was about 8-9 hours on the road and I needed a pint.

The next day, we have our day. It was an amazing day. However, half the group, myself included, had to leave after tea/dinner as we had to get back to the real world the next day and weren't exactly heading back just around the corner. If I could go back, I'd make sure I had a full week where I was available. But it is what it is and after a taxi back to the train station (another 6 miles) where a couple of the others were making their way home, I made my way back to the coach station for a different route home.

Return Step 1 - Bristol to London Victoria ~120 miles

I'm on the coach at 9:30pm, I send the producer an email thanking him for another amazing day. This coach was one of the first-class comfy ones. Working USB chargers is always a plus. The woman sat next to me fell asleep on my shoulder, but I was miles away watching YouTube. Before I know it, I'm in London Victoria coach station waiting for my last coach of the trip. Fun fact: my grandad worked in London Victoria coach station decades ago. I don't think it's had any work done since.

Step 2 - London to Middlesbrough: ~250 miles

The easier of the long hauls. The seats may not be the comfiest but I can still sleep when I have to. This is pretty much direct with a stop at Milton Keynes, another station I'm familiar with on other trips down south. My first long coach trip on my own, I stopped at MK before the current coachway was built, and it was just a couple of temporary cabins. It was freezing, I was sat on my bag at around 4 in the morning waiting for my next coach and a driver of a different coach just said "Where you going? Luton? Come on, it's on the way".

Step 3 - Middlesbrough to Home: ~15 miles

The other easy bit, the first bus wasn't until 6:30 so I popped to McDonald's for breakfast, then walked back, got the bus home, and got off the bus around 7:10am. 

Total distance travelled - 722-ish miles. (for £26, not bad) Worth it? absolutely


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